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Notes on relating, conflict, and repair.
Sky Blu
Why do fights happen
Fights happen when one or both of you get triggered and a story takes over. Name it, own your own reaction, take a timeout, then use a feedback wheel.
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Michael Schürpf
The feedback wheel: how to bring up what upset you without starting a fight
The feedback wheel: bring up one thing that upset you and ask for what would help. Calm down first, then what happened, the story, the feeling, the request.
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Michael Schürpf
The check-in: a fundamental relational practice for couples
A 15-minute check-in practice for couples. One speaks, one listens. Build emotional intimacy, presence, and a vocabulary for your inner world.
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